The Significance of Juneteenth
Juneteenth became a federal holiday in 2021 and now some people in the United States can get the day off work on June 19. However, it’s unclear whether many people understand the history behind Juneteenth. In this blog, I will provide a brief history of Juneteenth and how parents can begin talking to your child about Black history.
On the eve of January 1, 1863, enslaved African Americans gathered to hear Abraham Lincoln had signed the Emancipation Proclamation. The Proclamation legally changed the life of 3.5 million African Americans from enslaved to free. However, 2 years later in 1865 on June 19th the Union troops descended upon Galveston Bay, Texas to bring that change to 200,000 other enslaved African Americans.
It’s important to note how it took 2 years for Texas to catch up to the proclamation of 1863. Opal Lee and other activists worked tirelessly to finally get Juneteenth recognized in the United States. We must all make an effort to support Black businesses, acknowledge their history and continue to fight for Black people’s rights.
Why explain it to my child?
Black history is part of American history. The more we acknowledge it, the better we, as a nation can heal from the various scaring that has happened. The more likely we are to prevent repeating the same cycle of similar types of bigotry and hate. Parents want to live in a happy, prosperous and thriving place for their child. This happens with kindness, respect towards differences, and with an open mind. We must instill in our children from an early age the acceptance of others, diversity and a willingness to learn even if feelings of discomfort arise. The risk of denying our history is that we will repeat mistakes, patterns of oppression and systemic racism keep coming up for us as Americans. It is our job as parents to break the cycle of oppressive environments, the systems that enable them, and the people in positions of power upholding them.
Ages 0-5 years old
Children are very concrete learners. They don’t know how to tell time from the ages of 0-5 years old. One moment can feel like yesterday to them, but in reality it was perhaps weeks ago. Children also form stories over time and so that is a great starting point for birth to five years old. For example, children’s books like Before She was Harriet by Lesa Cline Ransome are available at the local library for parents to read about Harriet Tubman’s life.
If a child is able to pay attention to the storyline and then share their feelings, that is a success. A child may respond quietly with not much to say. Perhaps the third time reading the book, a child of deep empathy can say, “that was a sad story. I feel really sad.” A parent can respond, “yes, sometimes people have sad parts of their life. Thank you for sharing your sad feelings. I am so glad you were able to let me know how you feel. All feelings are safe here with me.” You begin to allow the child an open expression of feelings and you allow the child exposure to Black history. The parent can begin to learn about their own child and their ability to empathize. Some children may be highly sensitive and then express “Mommy, I don’t want to read that box again because I feel sad.” The parent can respond respectfully and say, “thank you for letting me know your limits and what you prefer to read.” You may even ask later why they don’t like it and they may share a facial expression they see that deepens their ability to empathize with the main character. This enables a trusted bond with your child that you will respect their boundaries.
Ages 6-9 years old
Children at this age are starting to hone in on concepts like kindness, the depth of history like when children were mistreated. Many times, they have already seen bullying at their school or have experienced it themselves. Children can learn from books like Henry’s Freedom Box by Ellen Levine. This children’s book is very appropriate because it talks about a child’s experience at a different point in time during enslavement. Henry is a boy that is enslaved and has never known his own birthday. As a parent, if you read this book to your child, your son or daughter may begin to empathize with the child that is around Henry’s age. Books can open the heart of empathy and really allow a child to explore their feelings about another similarly aged child leading a drastically different life.
I am Enough by Grace Beyers is also another book that helps teach children to look at children and help them accept others, even though they look different from them. You may also opt to find books that depict Black characters that appreciate their hair and what kinds of styles they have. I once read a book to my young child and he later complimented a Black woman’s hair at a doctor’s office. This woman’s face was absolutely filled with joy that a young child (aged 4) was there to appreciate her for who she is and in public for anyone to see.
Ages 9-13 years old
At this age you can begin talking about the Civil War because more than likely they have been taught about it with their teachers. Many times children have begun to empathize with the Black American struggle, as they have begun to learn about the Confederate Flag, Segregation and the story of Ruby Bridges. It helps instill a sense of kindness and respect for diversity. These conversations can keep going with parents, dinner time, in the car on the way to soccer or piano practice. You may ask your child, “do you know what the confederate flag is?” You may be surprised with your child’s answer. These are all ongoing conversations that you, as the parent, can limit or expand according to what you think is appropriate.
Ages 13-18 years old
Teenagers can handle many more nuanced conversations about racism, oppression and how the community is responding to current events. You may encourage your teenager to become active with understanding how they can articulate their own opinions and thoughts. Eventually, this will enable your child to ask questions and hopefully lead them to register to vote right when they are eligible at 18 years old. It really depends on the adolescent’s interest and the time of involvement. The most important aspect to parenting a child is to really try to understand their world and interests. They may care deeply about others but don’t have the direction or understanding of how to start involving themselves. Encouraging your child to explore and keep an open mind will help them advocate for what they want to see in this world as well as how to contribute to make it better.
Therapy and Parent Coaching
Becoming a parent has so many incredible responsibilities, but it also has tremendous rewards. Juneteenth is an opportunity for kids to learn about diversity and the history of Black Americans. Kids have a lot of energy and it takes time to figure out what each child needs individually. Parents often have trouble managing their child’s big emotions or helping explain various topics like Juneteenth. Know there are options for parents especially if you’ve never received the support you need. If race was rarely discussed or it was a stigma to talk about race in your family, you may benefit from a therapist that can help you navigate various questions you may have with your own child. Schedule a free introductory call here, email me here or call me at 803-573-0279.
